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David Davies

Referee's tale of the whistle, the whisky and the shotgun

Nigel Owens will take charge of the World Cup decider tomorrow.

IF THE WORLD Cup final ends tomorrow and nobody is talking about Nigel Owens, he says he will be “a very, very, very happy man”.

And happiness has not always been easy for the 44-year-old Welshman who has reached the referee’s pinnacle: controlling a final at Twickenham between New Zealand and Australia.

Owens has been blowing the whistle in internationals for 10 years. He is known for keeping the game moving, his decisions are never questioned and he communicates well with players.

Owens’ quips such as “this is not soccer” to scrum-halfs who complain too much are rugby legend. Former Wales captain Eddie Butler said that in an age of improving referee standards Owens “is a pioneer”.

Referees have not had an easy time at this World Cup however and Owens, a TV personality as well as respected match official, has asked dark questions of himself in the past.

Owens says that at the age of 26 he had considered suicide because he had kept his homosexuality a secret.

“I’d been fighting it for years, since I was 19. I came from a small community (in Carmarthenshire) which was probably a bit old-fashioned in the way I was brought up,” he told the Daily Mail newspaper in 2008 a year after he came out.

“The dirty linen of those dark times is out there in the public domain,” Owens added in a recent BBC Wales documentary.

“Everybody knows Nigel Owens suffered from depression and tried to kill himself and that he has been bulimic and was addicted to steroids as well as how he was bullied at school.

“Everyone knows these personal things but that is okay really as it helps other people.”

He said he would regret his suicide bid for the rest of his life.

“I left a note for my mum and dad saying I couldn’t go on. I took a loaded shotgun, a bottle of whisky and two boxes of paracetamol.” He then went for a last walk around his village.

- New man -

“Funnily enough what I took that night actually saved me as the whisky and the pills put me into a coma and had I not gone into that coma I would have pulled the trigger of the gun, of that I am certain.”

Police found him and he spent five days in hospital.

He realised the error of his ways but it still took several years to summon up the courage to tell his late mother Maya that he was gay.

“It may be only one word with three letters ‘gay’ but telling your mum you are gay is not easy. She cried and I cried.”

Rugby Union - Nigel Owens File Photo Andrew Matthews Andrew Matthews

Owens came out publicly in the most theatrical fashion on the Welsh TV show he co-hosted with former Wales fly-half and skipper Jonathan Davies.

“I had a text from him that he was going to come out,” Davies told the BBC. ”I said it didn’t bother me as a friend is a friend.

“I did say though you’ve got to come out of the closet literally on the show and we’ll sing ‘I am who I am’ and then we won’t mention it and see if anyone catches on.

“He was a bit dubious at first but then went for it.”

Owens is, according to those who know him, a changed man since that day. “I saw a more relaxed and happier referee,” Derek Bevan, the only other Welshman to referee a World Cup final, told the BBC.

Owens was subjected to homophobic abuse from a small group of England fans — who were exposed by disgusted fellow spectators — but on another occasion when watching a match his humour shone through.

“The referee made a decision and one of them shouted, ‘The referee is bent’, someone else a few rows further down said, ‘Oh no, that is Nigel Owens’,” he told RTÉ Radio.

“Then people started realising, ‘Oh he’s sitting there’. The guy apologised but I said, ‘I may be bent off the field but I’m certainly not bent on it’ and everyone started laughing.”

- Pirate Irwin 

- © AFP, 2015

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    Mute Vincent Bickerstaffe
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    Sep 9th 2013, 12:49 PM

    Not the most suitable time, both teams are not in Dublin… Travel will be a nightmare…

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    Mute John Hayes
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    Sep 9th 2013, 12:52 PM

    I’m a neutral but that 5pm throw in is a scandal. Im surprised they didn’t try to make history and play it 7pm under lights , first All Ireland final at night.

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    Mute brian magee
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:03 PM

    at least its a saturday.

    Must be trying to get people to stay th enight in the city. it’ll be a mad night in Coppers…

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    Mute Shanners
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:15 PM

    All games should be on a Saturday. Pain in the ass having to travel to Dublin in the first place but ya can’t even have a pint during/after the game coz you have to drive back for work in the morning. I for one am delighted it’s on a Saturday. Think the time is ideal too. not too late not too early.

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    Mute Japanese Margaret
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    Sep 9th 2013, 5:45 PM

    Ah will ya shtop now!!!!

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    Mute Mairéad Cahill
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    Sep 9th 2013, 12:46 PM

    Come on the rebels

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    Mute Nelly
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    Sep 9th 2013, 4:26 PM

    Good that the cork people get to spend another day in our CAPITAL city

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    Mute Tom Collins
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    Sep 9th 2013, 5:02 PM

    We’re just coming up to add a bit of class to the place

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    Mute Tom Collins
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    Sep 9th 2013, 5:08 PM

    So that’s everyone pouring out of Croke Park in the near dark at 6.30 heading for trains, buses, cars and hotels. People will still start drinking at 11 or 12 out of big match habit. This is a disaster

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    Mute Ian Stack
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    Sep 9th 2013, 12:58 PM

    No matter what time of day or night, true fans of both teams will make the journey to soak up the atmosphere anyway…..if its anything to go by yesterday’s epic performance!

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    Mute Katie Barrett
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:39 PM

    Well I’m just happy to see the ladies weren’t made to reschedule again this year, that would be totally unfair. And if my county were in the final I’d be there no matter what time the match was on at be it mid-day or midnight. Good luck to both teams.

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    Mute Robert Callaghan
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:05 PM

    I can’t believe people are axisymmetric crying about the time if the kick off. You will get home 2 goes later than you expected… 2 hours?? How many of you ‘supporters’ thought you would even be in a final in September? Personally, id rather have to go to bed 2 hours later than usual, to have a chance to win an All – Ireland… But that’s just me

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    Mute macca13
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:08 PM

    It’s a throw in not a kick off

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    Mute Robert Callaghan
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:18 PM

    Cannot believe I wrote kick-off. My bad, I’ll just have to take that one on the chin.

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    Mute Susan
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:39 PM

    If you want to go to Croker you will find a way!If not then watch it on a big screen in the local or at home.Either way teams will feel supported.Kids would be rightly delighted to stay up late on a weekend night and will remember it forever!Now quit moaning.

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    Mute Boo Forever
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:02 PM

    This forces many to stay overnight on saturday. Disgraceful decision and verging on the corrupt.

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    Mute Chris Kelly
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:28 PM

    No it doesn’t there are late trains and buses running

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    Mute Shanners
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:15 PM

    Also these magical things called ‘cars’

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    Mute P O Leary.
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:21 PM

    I would say Bus Eirann and Iarnród Éireann will have late buses and Trains for the day.

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    Mute Barry Dunne
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    Sep 9th 2013, 4:15 PM

    Explain, please, how this is corrupt.

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    Mute James Murphy
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    Sep 9th 2013, 12:49 PM

    Away in Germany for the final, better start checking for Irish bars.

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    Mute Diarmuid Lenihan
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:03 PM

    If you’re in Munich go to Kennedys. Other than that I don’t know.

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    Mute James Murphy
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:30 PM

    Staying in dusseldorf, so if anyone has any suggestions that would be great

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    Mute Pauliebhoy
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:22 PM

    The Shamrock Bar, there has to be one there

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    Mute Conor O'Callaghan
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:25 PM

    O’Reillys in the Marktplatz. Great spot!

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    Mute Adrian O'Donnell
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    Sep 10th 2013, 12:07 AM

    Oscar Wilde in Berlin. Seen two finals there. When Kilkenny thrashed Limerick and when they were last beaten by Tipp. Lively spot worth a look just off the Ubahn at Friedrichstraße

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    Mute Kevin Beakey
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:17 PM

    Typical of GAA… No thoughts for their life blood their supporters… Potential finish at close to 7pm.. Add in post match celebrations… Supporters getting Home at early hours of the morning On the roads at the most dangerous time of the week Sunday am….
    Disgrace!!!!

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    Mute joe o shea
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:09 PM

    5pm are they serious?? terrible blagarding of the fans

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    Mute Sean Page
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:30 PM

    Lads I’m living in Korea… 8 hours ahead and I’m up in the morning at 5.30am everyday… there’ll be no sleep for me that night…

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    Mute Adrian O'Donnell
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    Sep 10th 2013, 12:12 AM

    Ya poor bollix!!

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    Mute Mairéad Cahill
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:46 PM

    Cork are going bring back our cup :) :)
    Up the rebels :)

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    Mute Michelle Mc Loughney
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:22 PM

    5pm in Dublin on a Saturday, nightmare. Poor fans travelling with small kids etc. Not ideal.

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    Mute macca
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:17 PM

    Shopping is huge on a sat in dub and the shops plus for congestion reason, that’s why it’s not at 3.30! The shops wouldn’t want the game early

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    Mute Stephen Tyrrell
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:30 PM

    Shops will be closed at 6, the match won’t be finished til near 7 o’clock.

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    Mute Chris Kelly
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:30 PM

    Talking through your arse there the Luas and buses and trains aren’t affected by shoppers

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    Mute macca
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:40 PM

    It’s for congestion purposes! When I heard it was say I knew straight away it wouldn’t be 3.30 throw in at croke park

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    Mute Stephen Tyrrell
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:57 PM

    3:30 throw in every Sunday. Nothing to do with congestion.

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    Mute macca
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:58 PM

    Saturday is not Sunday and its in Dublin lol

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    Mute Joe hallahan
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:15 PM

    Ian, true supporters still deserve to be treated better than this. 5 pm is ridiculous when you consider small children. What they give with one hand( ticket reduction etc . They have removed with the other. If Munster were playing Leinster and sky set it for 2 or 3 then that is when it would be played. Very bad decision and as a Season ticket holder I will have to think long and hard about going up for the replay because of this.

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    Mute Shane O Reilly
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:15 PM

    Ill take your ticket if you decide against.

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    Mute Paul McGovern
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    Sep 9th 2013, 3:12 PM

    What does the timing and tv coverage of a hypothetical rugby match have to do with it?

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    Mute Declan Sweeney
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:42 PM

    Croke Park was not sold out yesterday the attendance was 81366 there were about 1000 free seats

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    Mute colm connolly
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    Sep 9th 2013, 3:51 PM

    It was sold out, it just means 1000 or so tickets went unused ,season ticket holders and country board members not bothered to go

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    Mute Pat Cussen
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    Sep 9th 2013, 3:11 PM

    Lie down will ya..hurling is the best game in the world..just because ye jackeens are no good don’t mean you have to comment like that..

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    Mute Aideen Thornton
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    Sep 9th 2013, 4:02 PM

    Sorry Pat? Is it Limerick you’re from? The ‘Jackeens’ matched you this year. We both won our provincial title, and we both got to the All Ireland Semi final.

    Actually scrap that, who beat Limerick in the league final and got promoted to Div 1a? The ‘Jackeens’ did.

    If we are no good please tell me what that says about you?

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    Mute Len Dowling
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    Sep 9th 2013, 8:20 PM

    A lot of people on here moaning about ‘small kids’. If heading home at 7pm is too much of a stretch them I suggest they’re too small to be at the game anyway. It’s not a school night so they can have an extra sleep in the morning. That said, any 8yr old will be more than happy to sleep in the car after bring part of the big day.

    A 3pm Sat throw in would lead to a very sterile atmosphere & exclude many from attending. The GAA get a lot of stick but I think they have this right.

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    Mute Angela Coll
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    Sep 9th 2013, 9:27 PM

    So it’s going to be a late night
    It’s not like Clare get to go up every year (we’re not Kilkenny more’s the pity)
    Leave Dublin around 8pm after seeing the presentation
    Home to Ennis before the pubs close
    Spend Sunday preparing to welcome Liam home
    #Upthebanner

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    Mute Null
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    Sep 9th 2013, 3:55 PM

    This game should be done, Clare really blew that…

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    Mute Austin Murphy
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    Sep 9th 2013, 4:11 PM

    It just doesnt sound right. All Ireland final on a Saturday evening. Cant get used to saying it. At least the ticket prices are being reduced.

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    Mute macca13
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:01 PM

    It should be in thurles or limerick

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    Mute Pauliebhoy
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:24 PM

    And people won’t complain about there not being enough tickets as its in a smaller stadium?

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    Mute Marc Lynch
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:47 PM

    The time is fine..no problem with it. The M7 will be jammers again though…should be an extra lane either way all the way to the Cork turnoff at portlaois

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    Mute sean de paore
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    Sep 9th 2013, 5:00 PM

    An awful lot of country folk attending Gaelic and hurling have no interest in Coppers, pubs excetera. This is the GAA testing the waters for future later starts for tv purposes.
    I for one hope it fails.

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    Mute Austin Murphy
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    Sep 9th 2013, 9:52 PM

    Late September with the shadows from the stands. I wouldnt rule out a Saturday evening All Ireland with floodlights.

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    Mute george holmes
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    Sep 9th 2013, 1:48 PM

    They Talked to the Gards about it, well what’s the diff in having at 3:30 on a Sunday but not on a Saturday. Makes no sence.

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    Mute brian magee
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    Sep 9th 2013, 2:12 PM

    Sunday is much much quieter than Saturday in Dublin .

    I reckon its to get the get the supporters to spend money in Dublin, either on Accomodation, shops, or in the bars.

    fans who arrive straigh tto the stadium and go home straight afterwards add nothign to the city but congestion.

    Fans who spend a few hours or a night are much more benefical.

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    Mute Joanne Mc D
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    Sep 10th 2013, 2:38 PM

    When are the tickets on sale , i know you have to be some kind of member of the gaa website to get them . But if anybody by anychance has 2 for sale please let me know :) or where i can buy some :) thanks

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