IT’S NOT THE most inconvenient World Cup ever. But unless you have the kind of fictional job that allows you stroll home in the sunshine, stop for snacks and supplies and still land in the door in time for a five o’clock kick-off, then you’re going to need to do some form of wriggling to do to rid yourself of the shackles of that place that gives you money every month.
So, whether you’ve got a particular fixture in mind or just want to watch some football without taxing your brain cells to figure out how much sleep it will allow you before trudging back to work, here are nine top tips to making yourself scarce at the office, site, warehouse or assembly line over the next four and a half weeks.
Wise up, stock up
You don’t want to be caught strolling down to the shop for bag of nachos or a litre of milk when you’re supposed to be at the grindstone.
If you’re in for the long haul, stock up on non-perishable foodstuffs and beer and batten down the hatches until July 13.
Colleen, I assume you've got four more trolleys still to come? PIC BY EAMONN & JAMES CLARKE
PIC BY EAMONN & JAMES CLARKE
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You could feign injury
Take a leaf out of your old pal Rivaldo’s book. Make it dramatic, scream and cry and collapse when you ‘accidentally’ trip over that ream of A4 paper ‘somebody carelessly left lying around’.
EMPICS Sport
EMPICS Sport
Framing your boss for assault seems to work pretty well in the movies
Calling in sick could do the job too
Tell everyone you’ve got some nasty gastroenteritis. End of questions.
'Yeah, there's a bad bug going around alright.' EMPICS Sport
EMPICS Sport
Surely you could find somebody to cover for you?
Once Stevie teaches this dude how to under-hit a backpass he’ll have the summer all to himself.
PA Archive / Press Association Images
PA Archive / Press Association Images / Press Association Images
A simple system of pulleys might even IMPROVE productivity in your absence
TheScore.ie's foolproof guide to skiving off work to watch the World Cup
IT’S NOT THE most inconvenient World Cup ever. But unless you have the kind of fictional job that allows you stroll home in the sunshine, stop for snacks and supplies and still land in the door in time for a five o’clock kick-off, then you’re going to need to do some form of wriggling to do to rid yourself of the shackles of that place that gives you money every month.
So, whether you’ve got a particular fixture in mind or just want to watch some football without taxing your brain cells to figure out how much sleep it will allow you before trudging back to work, here are nine top tips to making yourself scarce at the office, site, warehouse or assembly line over the next four and a half weeks.
Wise up, stock up
You don’t want to be caught strolling down to the shop for bag of nachos or a litre of milk when you’re supposed to be at the grindstone.
If you’re in for the long haul, stock up on non-perishable foodstuffs and beer and batten down the hatches until July 13.
You could feign injury
Take a leaf out of your old pal Rivaldo’s book. Make it dramatic, scream and cry and collapse when you ‘accidentally’ trip over that ream of A4 paper ‘somebody carelessly left lying around’.
Framing your boss for assault seems to work pretty well in the movies
Calling in sick could do the job too
Tell everyone you’ve got some nasty gastroenteritis. End of questions.
Surely you could find somebody to cover for you?
Once Stevie teaches this dude how to under-hit a backpass he’ll have the summer all to himself.
A simple system of pulleys might even IMPROVE productivity in your absence
Be ruthless, how many fictional deaths have you inflicted on your beloved relatives?
If you’re caught sneaking out just act like you’re on official company business and don’t have time for any accusing glances
https://vine.co/v/Mpj1DIjthAB
Keep the head down when you get back to your desk and nobody will suspect a thing
And then you can vanish off on that fortnight-long holiday you booked ages ago.
Here’s your essential World Cup glossary of things players do with a football
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awol for futbol Brazil 2014 cup out false 9 go awol for futbol skiving off World Cup 2014