1. Get your kilts on

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Golf’s coming home to Scotland this year, a fine excuse to air out your thighs.

2. Book Monday off

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Europe are heavy favourites, which means Sunday night could be spent celebrating. Plan ahead accordingly.

3. Temporarily enjoy Ian Poulter

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Ian Poulter spends 23 months every two years being insufferable. He works hard at it too; as evidenced by the pants. Then, the Ryder Cup begins, and for 3 days he is God.

4. Shave ‘Europe’ into the side of your head

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5. Prepare an opinion on Mcilroy’s driver

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In the midst of the greatest run of form of his life, Rory has decided to change his driver. I guess it worked for Mickelson…

6. Drink every time there’s a Monty mention

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Colin’s Ryder Cup record is pretty extraordinary, having never lost a singles match through eight tournaments. This may be mentioned from time to time over the weekend.

7. Play some morning pitch and putt

It's no football, but Hans Moleman would still be proud. Fod4 Fod4

You know you’re going to be gagging to hit a few balls once it starts, get it all out of your system with a nice morning round.

8. Constantly complain about those boorish yanks…

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…while wildly celebrating similar behaviour from Europe

Go on the Poultergeist! That's not his nickname? Well....it should be. Vox-cdn Vox-cdn

Nigel Farage is Europe’s unlikely Ryder Cup cheerleader

Rory and Lefty to go head-to-head on the first morning of the Ryder Cup