1. He could put Fran The Man in as assistant manager

Four-four-two with Connor Sammon leading the line? Coolabola, Nidgey!

2. In fact, the entire backroom team would be pretty much sorted.

We’d like to see Aido on the sideline with an Ipad and James McCarthy by the elbow. Fizzy orange Tommy enthusiast Tommy may need to change it up to energy drinks however.

3. What a motivator: he knows which players need a kick up the backside

(Or, more accurately, which to to give the lash of a length of Wavin).

4. And which lads need an arm round the shoulder

‘You’re as good as any lad in that dressing-room, Dadle.’

5. After the Trap era, he’s adept at modern communication

Despite the Real IRA hunting him down, he always took time to update his Facebook. He’d have no hassle WhatsApping the likes of Stephen Ireland every now and then.

6. He’s ruthless

Pic: Nidgeofficial

Nigel Dempsey would have no hassle dropping Richard Dunne if he thought the big man was unfit, no matter how much of a servant he’s been.

7. He’s tactically astute

Pics: DailyEdge.ie

He’s managed to stay unbeaten — bar a few bloody noses — until now. Germany away wouldn’t be too much of a step up compared to John Boy or The Branch.

Last night’s Love/Hate: Dead cats, Nidge’s arse, and fizzy orange

Bender twins ruled out of Germany squad to face Ireland