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Don't touch that dial... here's the sport on TV this weekend

Get your feet up and turn the phone off. There’s no need to go outside the door.

LET’S ALL GET our pyjamas on, get the fire lit, order a chicken supper and stay here for the weekend.

  • One to sit in for: Kerry and Armagh could be really interesting, and if you can bear the obscene gestures and bad language (and that’s just the managers) United v Liverpool will be good.
  • One to Sky-plus: France and Ireland sure is mouth-watering… but 8pm? I usually watch a programme on Channel 4 counting down the 100 funniest TV moments at that time of the week.*
  • One to skip: Cricket at 6am. Not for me, Jeff.

*Del Boy falling through the bar is number one obviously.

Today

Basketball: NBA, New York Knicks v Los Angeles Lakers, (ESPN, 1am, Sat).

Cricket: Commonwealth Bank ODI, Australia v Sri Lanka (Sky Sports 2, 6am).

Cycling: Tour of Qatar (Eurosport 2, 12pm).

General: Seo Spóirt, (TG4, 8.30pm).

Golf: The Dubai Desert Classic (Sky Sports 1, 6am, 10.30pm); AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am (Sky Sports 3, 8pm).

Rugby: RaboDirect Pro12, Ulster v Dragons (RTÉ Two & BBC1, 7pm). Premiership, Sale Sharks v Worcester Warriors, ( Sky Sports 2, 7.30pm). French Top 14, Biarritz v Toulouse, (Setanta Ireland, 7.55pm).

Skiing: Alpine World Cup from Sochi, (Eurosport, 8pm).

Tennis: The Open GDF Suez (Eurosport, 1.30pm, 6pm)

Simon Zebo, Gordon D’Arcy and Willie Bennett this week at Carton House. Pic: Inpho/Dan Sheridan.

Tomorrow

Boxing: Prizefighter, light-welterweight bouts, (Sky Sports 1, 8pm).

Cricket: Commonwealth Bank Series, Australia v India, (Sky Sports 2, 3am).

Football: Premier League, Manchester United v Liverpool, (Sky Sports 2, noon), Everton v Chelsea, (Setanta Ireland, 2.30pm), Tottenham v Newcastle, (ESPN, 4.30pm). Premier Soccer Saturday, (RTÉ Two, 8.20pm). npower Championship, Blackpool v Portsmouth, (Sky Sports 2, 5pm). Clydesdale Bank Premier League, Dunfermline v Rangers, (ESPN, 11.15am). African Nations Cup third-place play-off, (Eurosport, 6.30pm). Primera Division, Osasuna v Barcelona, (Sky Sports 4, 6.55pm); Real Betis v Athletic Bilbao, (Sky Sports 4, 9pm). Serie A, Cagliari v Palermo, (ESPN, 7.45pm).

GAA: Allianz Football League Division 1, Dublin v Mayo, (Setanta Ireland, 6pm); Kerry v Armagh, (Setanta Sports 1, 6.55pm).

Golf: European Tour, Dubai Desert Classic, (Sky Sports 1, 9am). PGA Tour, AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am, (Sky Sports 3, 6pm).

Horse racing: Channel 4, 1.55pm.

Ice hockey: NHL, Calgary Flames v Vancouver Canucks, (Setanta Ireland, 3am, Sun).

Rugby: Six Nations, Italy v England, (RTÉ Two, BBC1, 3.30pm); Ireland v France, (RTÉ Two, 7.30pm). The Breakdown Rugby Highlights, (Setanta Ireland, 5pm). Premiership, Gloucester v Northampton Saints, (ESPN, 2pm).

Skiing: Alpine World Cup meeting from Sochi, (Eurosport, 8am); Alpine World Cup meeting from Soldeu-Grandvalira, (Eurosport, 9.45am).

Tennis: WTA Open GDF Suez, (Eurosport, 1.30pm).

YouTube credit: BOS000001

Will Ferrell introduced two NBA teams this week. I’d like to see this at Parnell Park.

Sunday

Athletics: BW-Bank Meeting in Karlsruhe, (Eurosport, 4.30pm).

Cricket: Commonwealth Bank Series, Australia v India, (Sky Sports 2, 6am).

Football: Barclays Premier League, Wolves v West Brom, (Sky Sports 1, 1pm), Aston Villa v Manchester City, (Sky Sports 1, 3.30pm). Primera Division, Villarreal v Granada, (Sky Sports 1, 6.30pm), Real Madrid v Levante, (Sky Sports 1, 8.30pm). Serie A, Bologna v Juventus, (ESPN, 7.15pm). Bundesliga, Cologne v Hamburg, (ESPN, 4.15pm) African Nations Cup final, (Eurosport and ITV4, 6.30pm).

GAA: Allianz NFL, Donegal v Laois, deferred coverage of Monaghan v Kildare and highlights of Mayo v Dublin and Kerry v Armagh, TG4 2pm. League Sunday, (RTÉ Two, 8pm).

Golf: European Tour, Dubai Desert Classic, (Sky Sports 3, 8am). PGA Tour, AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am, (Sky Sports 3, 6pm).

Horse racing: Hennessy Gold Cup, Leopardstown, (RTÉ One, 2pm).

Ice hockey: NHL, Pittsburgh Penguins v Tampa Bay Lightning, (Setanta Ireland, midnight, Mon).

Rugby: Six Nations, Wales v Scotland, (RTÉ Two, BBC1, 2.30pm). Premiership, London Wasps v Saracens, (ESPN, 12.30pm). IRB Rugby Sevens, (Sky Sports 2, 5pm).

Sailing: Highlights of the Volvo Ocean Race, TG4, 12am (Monday)

Skiing: Alpine World Cup meeting from Sochi, (Eurosport, 7am); Soldeu-Grandvalira, (Eurosport, 8.45am).

Tennis: WTA Open GDF Suez, (Eurosport, 2.30pm).

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