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The 7 Alex Ferguson retirement jokes you'll be sick of by the end of today

Why do people keep telling us the same unfunny jokes?

LIKE ANY MAJOR story, news of Alex Ferguson’s retirement has brought out the worst in every wannabe comedian, rehashing the same set of jokes in desperate attempt to seem funny.

Here are seven that need to stop already. If anyone in the pub tells you one of these tonight, excommunicate them from your group of friends immediately.

1. This Black Eyed Peas joke

2. And this one

3. This “Scouser with a lamp” joke

4. This Howard Webb joke

5. This chewing gum joke

6. This injury time joke

7. And this one

Here’s how the stock market reacted to news of Alex Ferguson’s retirement

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