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The 7 Alex Ferguson retirement jokes you'll be sick of by the end of today

Why do people keep telling us the same unfunny jokes?

LIKE ANY MAJOR story, news of Alex Fergusonโ€™s retirement has brought out the worst in every wannabe comedian, rehashing the same set of jokes in desperate attempt to seem funny.

Here are seven that need to stop already. If anyone in the pub tells you one of these tonight, excommunicate them from your group of friends immediately.

1. This Black Eyed Peas joke

2. And this one

3. This โ€œScouser with a lampโ€ joke

4. This Howard Webb joke

5. This chewing gum joke

6. This injury time joke

7. And this one

Hereโ€™s how the stock market reacted to news of Alex Fergusonโ€™s retirement

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    Mute Kris Hetherington
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    May 25th 2019, 11:58 AM

    Forget about gender, race, religion. Just get the right people.

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    Mute Bungee Aky
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    May 25th 2019, 12:09 PM

    @Kris Hetherington: forget about race and religion, but the board of the FAI needs a balance of male and female reps. As brutally organised and administered As the menโ€™s game is the womenโ€™s is worse and participation levels of young girls has massive scope for improvement. The board needs a strong female voice that champions girls soccer.

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    Mute Bungee Aky
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    May 25th 2019, 10:40 AM

    Letโ€™s not be getting ahead of ourselves here, first things first is to get the board of the FAI into the early 19th centurary and then in due course up to date

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