Good early evening one and all. We’ll start you off with this bit of cheese on your footballing cracker: Wayne Rooney is on the Manchester United bench.

I’ll rveal the teams promptly then ask you for your match and first goalscorer predictions.

Man Utd: De Gea, Evra, Jones, Ferdinand, Vidic, Giggs, Carrick, Cleverley, Valencia, Welbeck, Van Persie.

No Shinji Kagawa in the United midfield while Antonio Valencia gets the nod on the right wing ahead of Wilfried Zaha.

Swansea: Vorm, Rangel, Chico, Williams, Davies, Britton, Canas, Shelvey, Dyer, Routledge, Michu.

Jonjo Shelvey set for his league debut with the Swans while Wayne Routledge will look to cut inside early and often to tee up the dangerous Michu.

The last time these sides met was late, late last season at Old Trafford. Michu cancelled out a Javier Hernandez goal before Rio Ferdinand ‘merked’ The swans with a sweet winner:

YouTube credit: uniconen

Ok, let’s be having your predictions.

Who do you fancy for this game and what player is going to net first?

Here, courtesy of The Telegraph’s Mark Ogden, is the Man Utd teamsheet (signed by assistant boss Steve Round):

Anderson, Rooney, Kagawa, Lindegaard, F da Silva, Smalling and Zaha on the bench.

Got distracted watching Man United fan Usain Bolt win the 200m title at the World Championships in a time of 19.66. Some man for one man.

“Manchester weather” quips Gary Neville as Sky Sports piece into the live feed from Wales. An acceptable result for David Moyes? “He has to win,” declares Ché Gaz.

Jamie Redknapp reveals that Wayne Rooney is a great sub to have on the bench. Welcome back Jamie.

Happy to be here folks, happy to be here. (Simon Galloway/EMPICS Sport)

Minutes away from kick-off and, so far, we’ve had one prediction for first goalscorer – Tom Cleverley. Still time to take a punt and claim the glory…

KICK-OFF!

Swansea get us underway.

If the compeition was judged over 90 seconds you’d say Swansea bossed it. Evra finally gets the ball back after a loose pass. Canás earns himself a yellow card for clattering Cleverley. Hospital pass from Phil Jones just before that and the result was Cleverley sent spinning into the Welsh air.

Shelvey whips in a dangerous cross that Ferdinand heads out for a clearance. Jones puts his head where it hurts to block the next cross. Before all that transpired, Welbeck went studs up but won his sliding tackle.

Jones with ANOTHER hospital pass. This time it was for De Gea. His swiped clearance attempt was blocked down by Michu but the result is a goalkick.

Better from Jones as he makes a good, swiping connection that forces Vorm to tip over. No danger from the corner and Swansea break, forcing Valencia to stop a break and earn a yellow card for the team. Nine minutes gone.

The weather in Swansea is rank. Van Persie drops deep and tries to dink a ball over the top but overhits the attempt. The home side stringing together passes  well. Chico Flores then gets the crowd going by sliding three yards to reach the ball first and send Welbeck into orbit.

Van Persie with a header that was never threatening. Giggs then bursts through but, rather than letting rip at the edge of the box, his attempt to tee up Welbeck is cut out by Rangel.

If you did not get a chance to read it earlier, British athlete Mo Farah has been hounding Wayne Rooney with tweets about signing for Arsenal. The response from Wayne? A frosty silence.

Danny Welbeck! The man is not a striker. He murders a great goalscoring chance after great work from Ferdinand and Valencia. He lets the midfielder’s pass run across him, eventually gets a shot off. Vorm parries and Giggs swerves a shot wide.

Michu has the ball in the United net BUT the goal is ruled out for an earlier offside. No doubt about it but United looked shaky there.

Phil Jones pays close attention to Wayne Routledge. (Nick Potts/PA Wire)

Michu out-battles Ferdinand and Evra to get a poked shot away. De Gea saves and Michu goes close with a header from the resulting corner.

Still level after 28 minutes. No urgency from United except for whenever Welbeck or Evra are on the ball. Surprising decision to go with Giggs from the start and I can see Kagawa coming on, with Welbeck going left and wide, if they continue to lose out on the centre midfield battle.

Many United players looking sluggish after their 27-year pre-season voyage to Asia, Australia, Stockholm and Waterford. Ferdinand and Carrick have been slack.

Hold up… GOAL! Swansea 0-1 Man United ( Van Persie ’33)

Lovely chip from Giggs, controlled on the chest by RVP. He lets it bounce and acrobatically slams in the opener. Very much like Mark Hughes in his pomp.

GOAL: Swansea 0-2 Man United (Welbeck ’35)

Cross from the left wing, Van Persie gets a slight touch. The ball falls to Valencia who squares for Welbeck to tap in from a yard out. Boom, boom for United.

You’ll want to catch that Van Persie goal later on if you can. It was an excellent, athletic effort that was more scissor kick than bicycle. Carrick picks up a yellow card. Three so far and it has not been a dirty game. 40 minutes gone.

This is a snapshot of the RVP goal:

Did you have him in your Fantasy Football team?

Cleverley makes his first impact on the game. He gets a yellow for a foolish sliding tackle on Rangel. Free in is headed clear by Jones. Injury injury time at the end of the first half.

HALF-TIME: Welcome to the crazy world of Manchester United David Moyes. So ordinary for so long, yet the Red Devils get an adrenaline shot from Giggs to score two goals in 90 seconds and are comfortable at the break. Expect to see Wayne Rooney at some stage of the second half.

What did you make of that? Who splashed out RVP for Fantasy Football?

• For anyone who wants to see that pearler from Van Persie, we’ve posted a story on the site about it. You can check the goal out by clicking here >>>

Second half is underway. Bony on for the Swans.

United will be more than happy to see this game out and take the sting out of the Swansea attacks. An indication of Moyes thinking will be his first substitutions. If Anderson comes on for Cleverley they are going to shut the game down. Good attacking intent from Laudrup and Swansea though. Bony was the top scorer in The Neherlands last season.

Michu takes a pass on from Dyer and hits the target but De Gea has time to get his body behind the effort. 50 minutes gone.

Shelvey’s corner is headed clear. The ball eventually finds its way to Canás but his shot zooters off high, right and wide.

Could you call De Gea brave there? Yes, just about. Bony cushions a header down to Michu and the United goalkeper gets out in time to get a touch on the Spaniard’s effort. Some tepid booing for Wayne Rooney as he warms up on the sidelines. Then, bizarrely, a ‘goals galore’ chant about Paul Scholes.

WAYNE ROONEY WATCH: As Robin van Persie pokes an effort wide from the angle of the six yard box, David Moyes talks to Wayne Rooney on the bench. The striker looks set to make his first appearance in red this season.

Bony gets a header off but it skitters wide. Rio Ferdinand gave him plenty of room there.

Wayne Rooney is on for Ryan Giggs. mixture of finger-pointing and applause from the travelling support.

Rooney playing a more advanced role than one might expect. Vidic is not happy about the amount of crosses flying into the United box but Moye’s men have sat deeper in the last 10 minutes. Into the final quarter and a Swans goal could spark some late drama.

Evra header off the line from a van Persie corner. Canás does his job on the line and the ball is hooked clear. Rangel let the French defender go there.

Close. Very close from Rangel. Ball lofted towards the back post and Rangel sets himself before rocketing an effort a yard wide.

A rare picture of Wayne Rooney not in training gear:

Yes Wayne, the other boys WILL pass to you. (Simon Galloway/EMPICS Sport)

GOAL: Swansea 0-3 Man United (Van Persie ’72)

Another corker from the Dutchman as he twists and turns before unloading an unstoppable shot into Vorm’s to righthand corner. Game over.

Lions and Scarlets rugby player Jonathan Davies is a fan of the Dutchman.

Another Bony header, another poor attempt. Should have been a goal there. Into the final nine minutes.

GOAL: Swansea 1-3 Man United (Bony ’82)

A chink of light as Welbeck tries to be smart but is caught in possession. Hernandez gets the ball, ships a pass to Bony and the finish is crisp. de Gea is absolutely livid with the United attacker.

“We support ou local team,” spew the Swansea faithful as Anderson replaces two-goal hero Robin van Persie. Four goals in two games from this goal-aholic.

And with that, there is four minutes left for Wayne Rooney to live out his dream as United’s number one striker.

Into injury time now and Unied will go joint top with Aston Villa until Chelsea score a banjo-load on Hull City tomorrow. 4 minutes of extra time left.

GOAL: Swansea 1-4 Man United (Welbeck 90 +2′)

Who said Danny Welbeck was not a striker? Me. Humble pie for my smart mouth as the forward pulls out an exquisite lob over Vorm after Rooney slipped him through on goal. Comprehensive stuff.

That is that. Win for David Moyes. This United boss craic is simples.

FULL-TIME: Swansea 1-4 Manchester United

Superb outing from Robin van Persie as he rifles two more goals. Welbeck surpasses his tally of league goals from last season in one match and the healing process begins for Wayne Rooney.

Should United be favourites after that emphatic start?