Welcome along. We’re not  far off kick-off now so best get the team lineups out of the way:

Arsenal: Szczesny, Sagna, Koscielny, Vermaelen, Gibbs, Arteta, Wilshere, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Cazorla, Podolski, Walcott. Subs: Mannone, Djourou, Ramsey, Coquelin, Rosicky, Gervinho, Giroud.

Newcastle: Krul; Simpson, Perch, Coloccini, Santon; Bigirimana, Tiote; Cisse, Marveaux, Obertan; Ba. Subs: Harper, Ferguson, Tavernier, Streete, Abeid, Sammy Ameobi, Shola Ameobi.

Both set of players are ready to start here. There’s just one problem… referee Chris Foy is nowhere to be seen.

And off we go. It takes 48 second for Arsenal to muster up their first chance. Jack Wilshere breaks through the middle and plays in Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain. The winger takes the shot on early but pulls it a couple of yards wide of the far post.

Santi Cazorla picks a ball out of the sky and launches a beautiful pass for Theo Walcott to take Danny Simpson on in a race. Tim Krul is out off his line in a flash, however, and makes an important clearance.

Sylvain Marveaux and Danny Simpson carve open a half chance and win the visitors a corner. From the set-piece, Demba Ba makes contact with his head but doesn’t test Wojciech Szczesny.

GOAL! Arsenal 1-0 Newcastle (Theo Walcott)

Sitting on the shoulder of the last man, Walcott latches onto a ball from Lukas Podolski and sets himself up with two touches before stroking into the corner with striker’s precision.

Here’s the goal:

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Cheick Tiote fires in a through-ball after patient build-up play but it’s zips past Ba, who had made a run.

Podolski again the supplier for Walcott but this time Krul makes a block with his leg when the England international looked odds-on to score.

Tiote, whose only Premier League goal came against the Gunners, blasts a shot towards Szczesny, who saves. Arsenal then counter through Walcott but he opts to pass instead of taking on Simpson and it’s intercepted.

Arsenal 1-1 Newcastle (Demba Ba)

Obertan is brought down 20 yards out and Ba steps up for the free-kick. His shot catches the head of Wilshere and wrong-foots Szczesny. The Emirates is silent as the striker celebrates.

Half-time: Arsenal 1-1 Newcastle

While we take a quick break, watch Arsene Wenger having major trouble with that sleeping bag-like jacket of his.

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And the Ba equaliser:

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We’re up and running again.

Kieran Gibbs gets into a great position but, maybe a little greedily, chooses to shoot with a couple of team-mates waiting inside.

GOAL! Arsenal 2-1 Newcastle (Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain)

The home side retake the lead and it’s another Gunner who played under Alan Pardew during his time at Southampton who finds the beck of the net. Newcastle lose out on a throw in their own half, Cazorla gains possession and tees up Oxlade-Chamberlain, who shoots low past Krul.

Thomas Vermaelen makes a well-timed challenge to halt Ba and Arsenal are away once again. Walcott has options but goes it alone and is well-wide with the strike.

GOAL! Arsenal 2-2 Newcastle (Sylvain Marveaux)

Obertan runs at Sagna, gets to the endline and puts the ball into a dangerous area. Laurent Koscielny can only get a toe to it and Frenchman Marveaux has the easiest of tasks to tap in at the back post.

Arsenal’s defending for the goal was bad…

GOAL! Arsenal 3-2 Newcastle (Lukas Podolski)

Wilshere wins possession, exchanges a one-two and floats a cross in. Fabricio Coloccini can do very little with his header and Podolski follows in to score from two yards out. Advantage Arsenal again.

GOAL! Arsenal 3-3 Newcastle (Demba Ba)

This. Is. Incredible. Kieran Gibbs is caught napping and allows Ba to sneak in and finish from an exquisite cross by Marveaux with the outside of his boot.

GOAL! Arsenal 4-3 Newcastle (Theo Walcott)

No words. Gibbs makes amends with a fine run. The defender finds Walcott and he doubles his tally with an emphatic finish while a couple of Newcastle players stand ball-watching outside the box.

Olivier Giroud is on for Oxlade-Chamberlain and he’ll fancy his chances of getting on the scoresheet with 15 minutes of this chaotic game to play.

Changes on each side: Gael Bigirimana leaves to be replaced by Shola Ameobi, Shane Ferguson in, Danny Simpson off, and Lukas Podolski is off for Aaron Ramsey.

Walcott is then yards away from a hat-trick.

GOAL! Arsenal 5-3 Newcastle (Olivier Giroud)

The Frenchman, only on, heads in a cracking cross from Walcott and that looks to be the points going Arsenal’s way.

GOAL! Arsenal 6-3 Newcastle (Olivier Giroud)

A second for the substitute. He picks up after Walcott’s run and drills past Krul.

GOAL! Arsenal 7-3 Newcastle (Theo Walcott)

That is special. Walcott gets a shot free-kick back goes by two players before being brought down for what is a certain penalty. Instead, he picks himself up and dinks the ball over Krul from a couple of yards out.

Full-time: Arsenal 7-3 Newcastle

MOTD is not to be missed tonight:

I’ll leave you with Walcott’s third goal, which is the pick of the lot.

YouTube credit: fostbal