Sound advice on how to avoid an altercation with a 100kg rugby player in our Comments of the Week

• Tom Brady might adhere to a strict diet, but Nigel still has some changes to make before joining him on the NFL’s list of all-time great quarter-backs:

Im eating a breakfast roll whilst reading this article……feelin pretty crap now

• With Katy Perry providing the half-time entertainment at this weekend’s Super Bowl, Mike Cullinane wonders if the New England Patriots need a new Equipment Manager:

The ball she’s holding looks flat, clearly a patriots fan!!!

Katy Perry was accused of having deflated balls. David J. Phillip David J. Phillip

• If you’ve been wondering why Owen Farrell has been ruled out of England’s Six Nations campaign, Rob O’H reckons he might have the answer:

Owen Farrell is currently in hospital having his head removed from his arse.

• As McGregor-mania grips the country, Ciaran has been diagnosed with MMA Fever:

I’m more of a boxing fan myself usually. Getting the MMA bug though, it’s exciting and I’d say I’ll be watching it more and more! It’s class and all the Irish lads are doing the country proud.

• Declan Snow asks a pertinent question in relation to Steffon Armitage:

What man in their right mind would get into a fight with him?? Lie down and play dead would be my best advice!!

Steffon Armitage. Approach with caution. Tim Ireland Tim Ireland

• Hey Real Madrid, any chance of giving us your teenage wonderkid for the next 19 years? Craving some new Norwegian talent, Mick Stafford never got over Oyvind Leonhardsen’s departure from Anfield:

I wonder if Real are open to loaning Odegaard to us (Liverpool) until he’s 35?

• Ulster’s 6’6″ forward Iain Henderson says he owns a Mini, but Christiaan Theron has his doubts:

How does he fit into a classic mini?

Iain Henderson drives a mini. Nothing is impossible. Morgan Treacy / INPHO Morgan Treacy / INPHO / INPHO

• Dan Smith doesn’t seem to be a fan of former ITV football host Adrian Chiles… or maybe he just rates his anatomy’s ability to host a TV show quite highly:

My left bollock is a better TV presenter than Chiles!!

• Amid speculation that Sunday’s Super Bowl could be Marshawn Lynch’s last game for the Seattle Seahawks, Jason Lyons says he’d be welcome on Leeside:

Lynch eh. He must hail from cork. Any chance he might switch codes and play back row for Munster ?

QUIZ: Are you a Super Bowl champ or chump?

McGregor is ‘the most entertaining man in combat sport’ according to Prince Naseem